On Meaning
I guess I shouldn’t be blogging so much recently, but I am; so if it’s too much for you — sorry! 
Writing helps me think of things and about things (Bryce is different - he has long conversations in his head and then it all comes out later).
I wonder how many of us think much (generally) and specifically, about the meaning of one’s life. It’s good to sit back and have periods of reflection about the course of life. Sure, I can spit out the right answers according to context: in many ways my studies are meaningful to me, my husband and family are more meaningful to me and in different ways than my studies, and ultimately Jesus is the most meaningful thing. But when I look at my life does this add up? Do I even think about how my attitude when I wake up illustrates where I find meaning? How about when I’m running late and huffing it up the Royal Mile? Or when I’m dead tired and don’t want to read anymore? How about when I don’t feel like going to church for whatever reason? Generally I resort to complaining about these various life hiccups. I love reading literature but only rarely does it begin to infiltrate my life and change it, to make it meaningful in any way.
I guess loosely I think about my life meaning something - as in thinking about my future teaching career and how I’ll be able to give back and try to help students make connections, or other vague notions of what the future might entail. I’ve always been driven and always future-minded; it’s hard for me to focus on the present (although I think I’m getting a wee bit better at it). But with all these big life questions it’s good to think of little things: how did my life mean something today? how did my actions, thoughts, and words reflect where I place meaning in my life? Today for me was a pretty balanced day: a few hours of reading, a lecture to attend, coffeee with a friend, and a wine, cheese, and bread supper in front of “Love Actually” with Bryce. But, I’m ashamed to say, I didn’t think about my day - I just *did* it - went through the motions, ticked off the things on my To Do list. So I’m not putting myself out there as someone to emulate but I do want to construct the everyday to reflect where I place my meaning; for if my meaning is solidly placed in Christ in whatever actions I undertake that day, the gospel will begin to be lived out in me; and that’d be amazing.
On another completely random note, what’s your personality or bloginality type? Take the short quiz and post your answers here! (I’m an INFJ and I think Bryce is somewhere between an ISTJ and an INTJ)
November 20th, 2004 at 8:06 am
Nice post. You are like me in the writing… it helps me think, as well.
As for the last bit…
“You are an INTP!” says the friendly computer. This is the first time I’ve delved into this stuff. Some people get so into it. I don’t know what it all means. I am scared.
November 20th, 2004 at 12:09 pm
Don’t be scared. It’s not like some mystical thing that will tell you all about your personality; and granted it doesn’t do justice to all the quirks that make us ‘us’. But, I do think it is interesting in moderation and helps me to sort of ‘figure people out’ if there’s something about them that bugs me, etc. Plus, to find out more, you cand read the links there to see if your ‘type’ is at all accurate.
November 20th, 2004 at 6:18 pm
I think too much, it’s a blessing and a curse; I try to pretend however that I’ve separated things into 2wo catagories, actions (the daily life stuff, responsibility for them, and the principal at hand (which I think people often forget about)), and my own theorys on society (but mostly that’s a critique). It’s interesting thinking about ones life, the long road to be traveled and the one they took to get where they are,,, more people should it. It’s my belief that if you try and reflect on what you’ve done, where you’ve been, things you’ve said, and take an alternate view of your-self at the current moment which passes before you know it, room for improvement will be found and I know I can become a better person. I won’t generalize and say all people can make improvements, because I’m not them and don’t know, but it’s food for thought.
As far as the test goes, I’m an INTJ with an NT personality,, I’ve taken that test before and always get the same answer every-time.
November 20th, 2004 at 10:51 pm
Good thoughts. I’m an INFP, which means I am also driven and future-minded, but much less likely to finish things I begin enthusiastically.
Getting better, though…
November 22nd, 2004 at 7:40 pm
I’m an ISFJ–Introverted, Sensing, Feeling, and Judging. I knew you and I would be close or identical, Ashley.
November 23rd, 2004 at 6:50 pm
Dare I admit amongst all of you introverts that I am an extrovert?
I seem to be an ENFP.
November 23rd, 2004 at 7:35 pm
The introvert/extrovert thing is really where we get our energy from - not nec. being social/anti-social - Es tend to get their energy from being with others; I’s must retreat and have ‘their own space’ to get recharged.